Breaking Up with the Pacifier: How (and Why) to Help Your Toddler Let Go

Let’s be honest—most parents have been saved by a pacifier at some point. Maybe your baby missed their sleep window and was overtired, or they had a bump that left them wailing. A quick pop of the pacifier, and like magic, peace returns. No judgment here—pacifiers can be lifesavers!

In fact, they even have real health benefits. The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) has found that pacifiers can lower the risk of SIDS, likely because babies are less likely to bury their faces in soft bedding when sucking on one. So, pacifiers are not all bad—in the right season of life, they’re helpful.

But here’s the tricky part: once your baby crosses into toddlerhood, that pacifier can become less of a helper and more of a sleep disruptor. If your little one is past their first birthday, it may be time to think about whether the pacifier is supporting—or sabotaging—their sleep.

Why Pacifiers Become a Sleep Problem

Pacifiers often turn into what we sleep consultants call a sleep prop. A sleep prop is anything your child depends on to fall asleep but can’t replace on their own when they wake up during the night. For some babies, it’s rocking or feeding. For many toddlers, it’s the pacifier.

Here’s why this matters:

• Babies (and adults!) sleep in cycles.

• A baby’s sleep cycle lasts about 50 minutes, much shorter than ours.

• At the end of each cycle, your toddler naturally drifts into lighter sleep and may wake briefly.

  
  

If they’ve learned, “I can only fall asleep with a pacifier in my mouth,” then when they stir in the night and realize it’s gone, they wake fully and cry out for help. Which means—you’re on call, running in to replace the pacifier, sometimes several times a night. Sound familiar? If so, it may be time to help your little one break free.

Why Going Cold Turkey Works Best

When it comes to pacifier weaning, toddlers respond better to absolutes than to half-measures. That’s why my advice is usually: choose a day, explain it to your child, and get rid of all pacifiers at once.

No keeping one hidden “just in case.” No giving it back for naps but not at bedtime. Those mixed signals only confuse your child and make the process longer and harder.

Yes, it can feel daunting. But toddlers are incredibly adaptable when parents are consistent. Within a few days (a week at most), they usually adjust beautifully.

How to Make Pacifier Weaning Positive

Here are a few tried-and-true strategies:

1. Mark it as a milestone. Frame it as an exciting step into “big kid” territory. Toddlers love growing up, and this can help them feel proud.

2. Introduce the Pacifier Fairy. This fun tradition works like the Tooth Fairy. Your toddler leaves all their pacifiers out, and the Pacifier Fairy comes to collect them in exchange for a small gift or surprise.

3. Keep it fair if you have siblings. If you also have a younger baby, avoid handing down your toddler’s old pacifiers. Seeing a sibling use “their” pacifier can trigger resentment. Get new ones for your baby instead.

   
   

Expect Some Pushback

I won’t sugarcoat it—your toddler will probably protest. Breaking a habit is hard at any age! But here’s the good news: the fussiness usually passes quickly.

During those first few nights:

• Distract, distract, distract. Have their favorite snack, a special toy, or a cartoon at the ready. Shift their attention before the meltdown escalates.

• Comfort without caving. Offer cuddles, reassurance, and empathy—but don’t reintroduce the pacifier. Otherwise, your child learns that crying brings it back, which only makes things harder long-term.

• Stay consistent. Remind yourself: the short-term struggle is worth the long-term reward of better sleep—for your toddler and for you.

  
  

The Payoff

Once your toddler learns to fall asleep without the pacifier, you’ll see the difference almost immediately. They’ll settle more easily at bedtime, resettle on their own during the night, and wake up happier and more rested. And you? You’ll finally get those glorious, uninterrupted nights of sleep you’ve been craving.

It might not be the easiest week you’ll ever have as a parent, but trust me—it will be one of the most rewarding.

✨ If you’re struggling with pacifier weaning or other sleep challenges, know that you don’t have to do it alone. As a certified pediatric sleep consultant, I help families find gentle, practical strategies that work. Together, we can help your little one sleep peacefully—and give your whole family the rest you deserve.